Remake City

We don't blame our parents for using the television as an electronic babysitter during our formative years -- hey, it was the '70s, everybody was doing it. At least they had the good taste to tune it to seminal action and crime shows that helped turn us into the "Rockford Files"-addicted adult we are today.

What we're saying is, being intimately familiar with the entire Quinn Martin oeuvre is not a bad thing.

So we're mulling the news today about a CBS plan to remake "The Streets of San Francisco," a particular standout of the genre that starred Karl Malden and Michael Douglas and his sideburns and, of course, the City by the Bay. We're not entirely pleased about this development.

The series, along with Malden, Douglas and various guest stars like Bill Bixby and Jessica Walter, racked up a number of Emmy and Golden Globe nominations (alas, no wins) for episodes with period-perfect names like "Mask of Death" and "Requiem for Murder," always read by that voice-of-god narrator in a really menacing tone. Remember that guy?

We won't argue that classic TV is fertile creative ground, but remakes for the big or small screen are more often than not incredibly disappointing. Wanted to love "Miami Vice," the Michael Mann version, really did. But we really didn't. "Starsky & Hutch" worked, and so did "The Brady Bunch." Those are rare. "Bionic Woman?" Here and gone, with good reason. "Knight Rider" and "90210?" Just can't get excited about those.

We have to admit a current wave of nostalgia's coursing through us -- how else to explain why we're watching that crappy pseudo-soft-core "Swingtown?" -- but we'd rather remember our favorite '70s shows as they were, however dated, than watch a lame "reimagining."

Any other grumpy flower children out there? Apparently not at the networks.